The wisdom of Crash Facepalm!

The only real question is cappuccino or straight double shot of espresso?
Yesterday was strawberry. What's your favorite jell-o flavor?
I mean, really, does it even have to be said? What's your dead-obvious advice that's helped you through life? Brought to you by our killer merch! 
Just give in and give 'em the wet food. It's going to happen, sooner or later.
I'm sure I will have going to have solved this problem next week.    
And, of course, make sure you know what the game is!
And this is how I learned to love wet food...
Crash Facepalm's confidant, Orbit, has wisdom as well...
I'm just a little upset that the princess ended up having to rescue me!
That said, I do pretty well. The Universe and I have an... understanding.
I hear she has a solid career in finance these days...
You'd think I'd have blown this goal already...
And remember, delegating to your cat is a thing! ( while I'm here - Crash Facepalm shirts! )
I navigate spacecraft to exciting and expensive ground impacts. I call it groundbraking!
Nobody lives rent-free in Crash Facepalm's head...   Don't miss out on this great design! Join Crash Facepalm in Occupying Mars (well, he crashed, so he doesn't have much choice). A portion of proceeds will be sequestered so we can give some filthy lucre to The Planetary Society!